Do couple therapists “pick sides”?
No! I firmly believe that each person’s behavior makes sense to him or herself. It is my job to develop a strong partnership with both members of the couple, or else our work together will be fruitless. Couple therapy with unbalanced, biased practitioners rarely achieves satisfying progress toward the goals of the couple. I am resolutely committed to understanding and supporting both members of the couple. The delicate work of gaining deeper self-awareness and bringing about sustainable change can bring up difficult emotions, and it can feel like things are getting worse before they get better. My goal is to help you feel understood and supported in this process, and to collaborate with the couple to bring to light what will be most helpful for the relationship.
How do I know if we need therapy?
The average couple experiences turmoil or dissatisfaction for six years before asking for help. Many struggle on their own for months or years hoping things will get better and not knowing what else to try. Feeling stuck is a good sign that you could benefit from working with a trained mental health practitioner. A therapist can hear your concerns in a way that your partner or a friend might not be able to, and is trained in evidence-based treatment methods specific to your particular problem.
What if we are not sure our marriage can be saved?
The principles of Discernment Counseling might offer some hope for couples in crisis. Please see the details under the Services tab for more information.
How long will it take?
Unfortunately, this is not possible to say in a general FAQs page. Everyone’s circumstances are unique, and the length of time counseling can take to allow you to reach your goals depends on your desire for personal development, your commitment, and the factors that are driving you to seek counseling in the first place. The models of therapy I employ use a specific process that has defined steps, stages, and marks of progress. At any time, you may ask to review where we are in the process.
I want to get the most out of therapy. What can I do to help?
I am so glad you are dedicated to getting the most out of your sessions. Your active participation and dedication will be most helpful in reaching your goals.